Goniff's Problem
by mollietaz
Summary: There comes a time when the world closes inand what youneed most in your life is family.
1. Chapter 1

Goniff's Problem

It had taken them two days to get to the boat and then another to get home and debriefed. Actor and Chief had been taken to the hospital and been checked over and the Dr. had decided to keep

Actor for a couple of days as his shoulder wasn't healing as well as it should. Chief was allowed to go back to the estate , but was told to let Craig know if the headaches that had been troubling him

since the explosion got any worse. Casino was his usual self , although not being able to rile Chief was irritating him , and boredom was beginning to set in but on the whole Craig decided things were

more or less back to normal with the three of them.

Goniff on the other hand was different. Craig was beginning to worry about him. He was far too quiet. He behaved quite normally for most of the time, but then sometimes Craig would look at him and

see a sadness that hadn't been there before, it was as if he had lost the spark that made him who he was, as if he had lost the reason to smile. Craig didn't remember anything that had happened

during the last few days that would have specifically caused this change in his character, he had not had to kill anyone close up, which he knew Goniff hated to do, and they had all come back more or

less in in piece, but if was plain for all to see that something was bothering him, all Craig had to do now was find out what.

It was late that night when Craig heard someone in the kitchen, he had been finishing off some of the never ending paperwork that seemed to accumulate whenever they were away. He walked into

the corridor and saw the kitchen light on and decided that a mug of coffee would go down rather well , especially if someone else had already made it. As he opened the door he saw Goniff sitting at

the table starring into his mug of cocoa, so lost in thought that he hadn't even noticed him come into the room.

`Penny for them Goniff`, he said.

Goniff looked up with a start.

`Sorry Goniff, didn't mean to startle you, any cocoa left? He asked, deciding it was as probably better for him at this time of night, than coffee.

`Yeah Warden, ` he said nodding towards the stove. `Help yourself`.

Craig did just that and then sat opposite Goniff.

`Up kinda late aren't you? `You alright? He asked, `Seem kind of quiet lately`. He said.

`Yeah , I'm fine, just kinda tired`, he said.

`Know the feeling `, said Craig. `You should get some rest, sleep in tomorrow if you like , we've got nothing to do`.

`Seem to be tired no matter how much sleep I get, feel tired inside, you ever felt like that? Goniff asked.

`Yeah, lots of times Goniff, ` sighed Craig.

`What do you do about it? How do you make it go away? He asked quietly.

`Try and get some alone time, peace and quiet, you remember that don't you ? He asked smiling.

`Not a lot of chance for that round here is there ? He asked.

Craig realised then that Goniff needed serious help to get over the misery he was feeling, that he needed someone to talk to, someone that had time to spend with him, and just him, before things got

so bad they couldn't be fixed, and he definitely wasn't going to find that peace and quiet here at the mansion, not with Casino about and Actor due back soon.

`Got an idea that might help `, he said

`Need something, said Goinff as he closed his eyes.

`Would you like to take off for a couple of days , go and stay with Angel maybe, I'm sure she has some odd jobs that you could help her with`, he said.

Goniff looked at him.

`On my own? He asked.

`If that's what you'd like I don's see the problem`, replied Craig. `So long as you promise to stay out of trouble`.

`You trust me to go on my own? He asked. `After the mess I got into last time?

`Any reason I shouldn't? asked Craig

Goniff shook his head.

`I think I'd like that Warden, if you're sure it's okay, ` sighed Goniff. `And no trouble , I swear`.

`Okay, I'll give her a ring first thing in the morning and make sure it's alright with her, and then you can go`, he said.

Craig got up to leave .

`Well I'm going to hit the sack, paperwork can wait until the morning, Goodnight Goniff`, he said.

Night Warden, and thanks, for understanding, I mean , for not thinking I'm going crazy , or anything`, said Goniff.

`This war makes us all a little crazy sometimes Goniff, the trick is to realise that you're not on your own, ask for help if you need it, `he said smiling.` As Angel would say, can't fix it if I don't know it's

broken`.

Goniff smiled back at him,

`Yeah she would say that wouldn't she ? He said.

`Goodnight Goniff, try and get some sleep , okay?

`Yeah, I'll try Warden, .`He said ,

As Craig reached the door Goniff called to him

`Hey Warden , you won't forget to call, will ya?

`First thing in the morning , I promise`, he said.

As he turned to look back into the kitchen Goniff was once more staring into his cocoa.

….

Angel arrived at the mansion early the next morning , even before Craig had a chance to call her. She had not a chance to see any of them since they got back, except Actor, and she wasn't satisfied

that they were all okay until she had seen if for herself. She had decided that breakfast was in order , and had managed to find bacon and some fresh eggs for a special treat. The place was quiet, it

was only six thirty and Craig was out for his morning run, and she suspected that the others were all still tucked up in bed.

She quietly made her way to the kitchen to make fresh coffee for when Craig returned. She opened the door and stopped in surprise as she saw that Goniff was sound asleep with his head his folded

arms and a cold mug of something in front of him. He looked as if he had been there all night , not like Goniff at all, she thought . There was one young man who definitely liked his bed. She closed the

door quietly and made her way back to Craig's office to wait for him.

A few minutes later there was a faint tap on the door and Casino's head appeared.

`Hi thought I heard someone down here`, he said.

`Sorry , didn't think I'd made that much noise, didn't mean to wake you`, she said.

`You didn't, ` he said.

`You alright ? She asked him.

`Yeah I'm fine. You talk to the Warden yet? He asked .

`Not since the call saying that you had all got back more or less in one piece, How is Chief by the way?

`Okay I think, you know the Injun, won't tell us even if his head does hurt`, he said.

`I dropped in to the hospital last night , Actor seems fine , the Dr says he can come home tomorrow, said I'd pick him up, save you guys the bother`, she said.

`Hey that's great`. Said Casino as he started to pace

`You want to tell me what's really bugging you, before you wear the carpet away? she asked.

`What's bugging me is sitting in the kitchen`, he said.

`Goniff? She asked.

`Yeah Goniff.` he said. `Something's wrong and he won't spill, keeps telling me he's okay when an idiot can see that he's not, wondered if you could talk to him, or something`.

`You got any ideas at all? asked Angel

Casino shook his head.

`All I know is he ain't right`, he said.

`I'll talk to Craig when he gets back and see what I can do , ` she said.

`Talk to me about what? asked a voice from the doorway.

`I'll see you later Angel`, said Casino as he turned and left.

`What was that about? Craig asked

`He's worried about Goniff, wants me to talk to him`, she said.

`Well that makes two of us`, he told her.

`You too? She asked.

`He needs a friend and some chilling out time, I thought it might do him some good to stay with you for a couple of days, if that's all right`. He asked her.

`It really that bad?

`Don't know why, or what's caused it, but he's on the edge right now, he needs to get away from here for a while, thought you might be able to help, he feels at ease with you, he loves you ,thinks of

you as family`, he said.

`I love the little limey too`, she said. `I came to cook you breakfast, so when that's done I'll take him home with me , he can stay as long as he needs too.`

Craig walked to her and gave her a hug and plonked a kiss on the top of her head.

`Knew you'd help`, he said

`No other choice, unfortunately I have come to care about all of them`, she said smiling at him.

`Yeah, they do kinda grow on you , don't they ? He asked laughing at her.

`I'll go and get breakfast started , you get cleaned up and I'll see you in the kitchen in thirty minutes, and don't be late`, she warned.

`For your breakfast, never going to happen honey`, he said smiling at her.

`Thirty minutes , remember, she shouted as she was halfway down the corridor.

There was no verbal reply , only his laughter as he made his way to the shower.

…


	2. Chapter 2

GONIFF 2

As Angel entered the kitchen she found that Goniff had gone.

She made coffee and decided to take it up to their room to make sure that everything was okay. She kicked the door with her foot .

`Someone want to open this I have my hands full`, she asked.

Casino opened it a crack and peered round.

`Not today thank you `, he said smiling, and closed the door.

Angel smiled.

`Fine by me just take my coffee somewhere else, sure the Sgt Major wouldn't say no to a good cup , even if some people have no sense `. She said.

The door opened abruptly and Casino almost snatched the tray from her hands.

`Just teasing baby`, he said.

`Well bless me , I'd never have guessed`, she said sarcastically.

`You want some? he asked smiling at her .

`Well that's so nice of you to offer , especially as I made it, but no thanks, ` she said grinning back at him. `I was going to make you breakfast , but I don't know whether I want to now, you being so

ungrateful and all`.

She plonked down in Actors' chair and watched Casino pour the coffee.

`Blown Breakfast eh? He asked. `Don't suppose there's anything I can do to make it up to you, now is there?`

`Weeeeeell. Suppose you could offer to do the washing up afterwards`, she said smiling at him sweetly.

`Huh, knew there'd be a catch, what you cooking anyway? He asked.

`Thought bacon ,eggs and toast might be nice`, she said.

`Okay I clear up, so long as they're real eggs`, he said.

`Fresh from the chickens Casino`, she said.

Casino passed the coffee to Goniff who took it and muttered his thanks.

Chief said nothing , just took the mug and sat down on his bunk.

Angel had been watching him.

`You still got the headache`, she asked him.

`Comes and goes,` he said.

`You taking the pills the Dr. gave you?

`Sometimes`, he said.

Angel walked over to him and picked up the pill bottle.

`Doesn't seem to be too many missing, how many have you taken , exactly? She asked.

`Not many`, he said without looking at her.

`She opened the bottle and took two out and placed them in his hand.

`Why put up with the headache when these will help? She asked `Now take them.

`They make me sleepy`, he said

Angel looked at him and sighed.

`Would sleep be such a bad thing,? Maybe it would help`. She said.

`Shouldn't sleep during the day, ain't right`, he said.

`Well maybe your body thinks different. Maybe you just need a good rest. You don't get much time to yourselves, so take what's offered. You've got no missions for the next week at least so sleep ,

eat and rest, give your body time to heal itself, you of all people should know what I mean, and keep taking the tablets or I'll give them to Craig and make him watch while you do`, she said.

He swallowed the tablets without further argument.

`Thank you `, she said `Now breakfast will be in fifteen minutes so don't be late`.

`Yes ma'am`, said Casino

She left the room and headed for the kitchen , realising that Goniff had not said a word to her. Craig was right , there was something terribly wrong. He was definitely coming home with her so she

could get to the bottom of all of this. Casino could keep an eye on Chief and Actor, would do him good to run round after them for a while. She entered the kitchen and got out the pots and pans she

would need and started to cook their breakfast.

…

She knocked on Craig's door two hours late with a fresh mug of coffee, not waiting for him to tell her to enter.

`Thought you might like this`, she said , putting the mug on his desk.

He looked up from his paperwork and put down his pen.

`Thanks Honey much appreciated, how are they doing? He asked.

She sat in the chair opposite him and sighed.

`Casino is fine apart from trying hard not to let on how worried he is about them both`,

`Both? He butted in.

`Both,` she said.

`Chief still has that headache and isn't taking any of the pills, you need to talk to him, make him understand that this headache will not go away without help, he feels out of control because they

make him sleep. Keep him down here with you where he's sure he's safe, let his sleep on the spare cot if you have to , but make him take the pills,` she said sternly.

`Yes ma'am`, he said smiling.

She laughed at him.

`Sorry , came on a little strong there , didn't I? just don't like to see any of them hurting, that's all`.

`I know Honey. There lucky that you care so much about them. Now what about Goniff? He asked.

`Him I am worried about, he hasn't said more than two words to me all morning, that's just not like him, usually I can't keep him quiet. I'll take him back with me ,maybe away from here he'll tell me

what's wrong, I can only hope so anyway`, she said.

`Let him stay as long as he needs to , he's no use to me the way his at the moment, he said.

`Well don't worry about picking Actor up tomorrow, Goniff and I will do that, might spend a little time in London first, see if a change of scenery will help any, ` she said

She stood up

I'll go and ask him if he'd like to come back with me`, she said `Won't disturb you again.`

He walked around the desk to her and kissed her cheek.

`Thanks, for everything`, he said .

`You're welcome little brother `, she said smiling at him. `Chief needs two more pills in an hour, then every four, alright?

He laughed at her ,

`I won't forget, I promise, will even set the alarm if it will make you feel any better`, he said

`It's not that I doubt you at all it's just that I know you and your paperwork, you lose track of time, `, she said

`That is just a malicious lie spread around by people who have arrived at meetings earlier than they should have`, he said laughing. `I was not late , no matter what they say`.

`I believe you, just heed my warning, Chief doesn't take his pills and I'm holding you responsible `, she said

He turned round and picked up his alarm clock, setting it for one hour.

`Satisfied? He asked.

`For now`, she said kissing his cheek, and smiling. `See you tomorrow, and call if you need anything alright`,

`I will Honey, I will `, he said .`

Angel left the office , and as he sat down to finish his paperwork , he smiled to himself and double checked the alarm.

…

Angel found Goniff sitting on the front steps with his head in his hands.

`Hi you okay , you're mighty quiet this morning, was beginning to think I'd done something to upset you`, she said.

`Naw , nothing like that`, he said quietly.

`You got your things packed? She asked.

Goniff looked at her,

`It's all right for me to come? He asked her.

`You're welcome at the cottage anytime Goniff, you should know that by now`.

`Not going to be much company`, he said

`All you have to do is come home and rest, eat what you want , have time to yourself if you want, and if you need someone to talk to I've been told I'm a pretty good listener`, she said.

`Goniff walked to the main doors and picked up the rucksack he had already stashed there.

`Can we go now, without going back inside? He asked.

`If that's what you want`, she said. Let's go find the jeep Craig's letting us borrow, shall we?

`Goniff sighed, and nodded.

`He felt drained, just so damned tired. Maybe with no distractions he could get some sleep, maybe with Angel the nightmare wouldn't seem so bad, at least Casino wouldn't be there to make fun of

him,

Oh how he wished just for things to be normal, just for a little while.

`You ready? Angel asked.

He got in the jeep and sat back and closed his eyes.

Angel looked at him and then took his hand and squeezed it.

`It'll be all right Goniff , you'll see, couple of days and you'll be as good as new.

As she started the jeep and drove towards the gates, he turned his head away so she couldn't see the tear slide down his cheek.

Angel pretended not to notice that he was trying hard not to break down. The sooner she could get him home and start to take care of him the better she would feel. One thing she knew for sure, he

was not going back to the mansion or on any missions until she thought he was ready. She would keep him with her until she knew for certain he was well again, and she didn't care how long took.


	3. Chapter 3

GONIFF 3

They arrived at the cottage twenty minutes later and Angel led the way waiting for Goniff to follow.

`You want to go upstairs or have the room at the back? She asked.

`Might stay down here if that's alright with you`, he said.

`Not a problem either way Goniff, do what ever you want. As far as I'm concerned this is your home for the next few days, so you treat it as such`, she said.

`Thanks `, he said and walked through to his room, closing the door behind him.

Angel busied herself in the kitchen for a while and then as Goniff still hadn't come out of his room she went and knocked quietly on the door.

When she got no answer she opened it and whispered his name. There was no reply so she put her head round the door to make sure that he was alright , and found him curled up in a ball on the

bed, sound asleep. She closed the door again and went and sat on the sofa. She stared at the closed door , and wished with all her heart that she could work out exactly how to help him.

…

Angel was up early the following morning , coming downstairs to find Goniff sitting in a chair in the front room.

`Morning Luv, you been up long`, she asked.

`Since about two`, he said.

`Well you did crash out when you got here yesterday, you not been sleeping to well at the mansion? She asked him.

`Wake up during the night, can't get back to sleep after that,`

`What wakes you ? She asked

`Have a nightmare `,

`You have one last night too? she said.

Goniff just nodded.

`Well why don't I stay down here tonight and then if you wake up you at least won't be on your own, think that might help?

`You'd do that for me? he asked her.

`Of course I would Goniff.

`Would like that , kinda scary waking up alone`, He said, not looking at her.

`How about breakfast? she asked, `We seem to have missed supper last night and I'm hungry, could you manage eggs on toast? She asked him smiling.

He gave her a weak smile.

`You know I think I could, you want me to make a nice pot of tea while you do that`, he asked.

`That Goniff is the best idea you've had so far this morning`, she said laughing.

They both headed for the kitchen and Angel for an instant ,caught a brief glimpse of the old Goniff. Well at least I know he's still in there somewhere she thought to herself , all I have to do now is find

him.

….

They went to pick Actor up later that morning and Angel had deliberately arrived early so that Goniff could have a chance to do whatever would cheer him up before they got to the hospital.

This was proving a lot more difficult than she thought.

`You want to get a cup of tea and a cake? She asked.

Having never known Goniff turn down cakes she had been slightly surprised by his reply of.

`Not really hungry right now`.

`Well, never saw that one coming`, she said smiling. `What would you like to do ?

`Go home`, he said sadly.

`Oh Goniff, I really wish I could arrange that`, she said.

Goniff looked at her.

`Oh I don't mean back to the States, I mean I want to get there real bad, I just mean back to the cottage, to many people here, just want to be on my own`, he said.

She gave him a hug.

`What about if we pick Actor up early and head straight back, would you feel better then? She asked him.

`He nodded.

`Yeah,` he said quietly, Sorry if I messed up your morning`,

`Goniff right now you are far more important than any trip to London, now let's go`. She said.

She put her arm round his waist and they headed back to the jeep.

….

Angel had talked the Doctor into letting Actor leave earlier than planned and then had dropped Goniff off at the cottage before going to the estate as he had told her he didn't want to go back there .

Actor's voice penetrated her thoughts.

`We going somewhere nice? He asked her .

`What?

`You just drove straight passed the gates`, he said looking at her worriedly.

`What? Oh damn`, she said as she stopped the jeep and reversed into the small lane to turn round.

`It must be bad`, he said.

`What?

`Whatever it is that has got you so preoccupied, It does have something to do with Goniff, I take it? He said.

`Right now what you see is what you get`, she told him. `He's miserable, doesn't know why, and he's afraid, having nightmares, don't know what to do with him yet.

`Things are that bad?

She nodded.

`Sorry about the detour`, she said smiling, `Have you back in no time , this time I promise.`

`Angel , believe me when I tell you I cherish every minute spent with you`, he said smiling at her,`Even if it is a mystery tour.`

She laughed at him and leant over and kissed his cheek.

`Why thank you kindly , sir,

This time he laughed.

`Are you ever going to take any compliment I give you seriously? He asked her.

`Never, she said, `It would make my life far to complicated if I started to take any one of you seriously, and right now if I don't get you back I'm going to have one stressed out Lt. on my

hands ,especially as I said we would be back early.

`Then let's go , shall we? Can't have the Lt. stressed , bad for his blood pressure , let alone ours when he's worried.` he teased.

`You tell anyone I missed the turning and I'll tell Craig the Dr. recommended a good dose of castor oil`, she said with mock seriousness`

He looked at her with horror.

`You are one vindictive woman, do you know that? He said.

She smiled at him.

`Oh yeah, and you ain't seen nothing yet, wait until I really get started`, she said.

As they arrived at the main doors Craig was there to meet them .

`You look a little pale, you all right? He asked Actor.

`Just fine Warden, thank you , think I will just go inside and rest for a while,` he said.

He reached and took Angel's hand and clicking his heels together he bowed and kissed it.

`You make an excellent chauffer Angel`, he said

`You sir are full of it`, she said smiling sweetly at him.

He laughed and turned towards the doors, leaving Craig and Angel together.

`Something I need to know about? He asked her.

She laughed at him and followed Actor inside.

`Oh please do come in and help yourself to coffee`, he said

`Was going to , little brother , but thanks for the invite, kinda makes it official and all that`, she said, `You coming?

He laughed , walked up behind her and linked his arm through hers.

…..

Chief and Casino were in the kitchen when she arrived.

`Actor said you were here , he's gone to lie down, you want some tea? Casino asked.

`Would be nice, thanks`, she said.

`So how is he? He asked.

Doctor says he'll be fine,` she said.

`Not Actor,` he said exasperated `The limey.`

`Was going to ask the same thing`, said Craig,

`Honestly , I don't know, says he's having nightmares , you any idea about what? She asked.

Casino shook his head,

`When I sleep baby , I sleep, didn't hear him wake up at all

`Angel looked at Chief.

`Know he's been up a lot lately, real early too, thought he just couldn't sleep, didn't know about the bad dreams`, he said.

`What about your head, it getting any better? You taking the pills? she asked looking directly at Craig.

`Yeah Warden keeps dishing them out, headaches are getting better though , Doc says I can cut the pills down to one at a time instead of two and see how that goes for a couple of days , and then

stop them if I want too` he said.

That's good, ` she said, `Glad the alarm clock worked`.

Chief looked puzzled.

`I'll explain later`, said Craig

`Hey maybe we should go visit the limey, cheer him up`, said Casino.

`Rather you didn't , I think he just want's some time on his own right now,` she said.

Casino turned his back on her and walked to the coffee pot.

She walked up behind him and nudged him, almost spilling his coffee.

`Don't worry , I'll not tell any one that you're really a big softee , and worry a lot`. She said

`You do and I'll deny it baby, don't have time to go around worrying about folks`, he said. `Look after number one that's my motto`.

She looked at Craig and Chief who were both finding it difficult not to laugh.

`Sure it is pappy`, said Chief.

`Ah what would you know Injun? He asked as he walked out of the kitchen trying to look angry.

`Well I got to get back, got to see what he's been up to while I've been away`, she said.

Craig caught her hand.

`You'll let us know if we can do anything, won't you? He asked.

Angel sighed.

`Right now I don't even know what I'm doing, ` she said, `I'm just hoping that he'll eventually open up and talk about what's bothering him, I don't know what else to do for him `, she said sadly.

`Maybe a friend's all he needs, he'll tell you when he's ready too`, said Chief.

Angel smiled and plonked a kiss on the top of his head.

`Don't worry , I won't tell Casino you're worried about Goniff too, wouldn't want to damage your image either`, she said smiling

`Don't need to tell me , heard it all anyway`, Casino yelled from outside the kitchen. You're going soft Injun, knew it had to happen`,

Chief stood up .

`Got to go and teach someone some manners`, he said , and without another word left the kitchen.

Angel smiled.

`You going to stop that before it gets started? She asked

`I'll give them a few minutes to let off steam and then they can go down to the firing range for an hour, that should cool them off a little.

`Got this down to a fine art haven't you? She asked.

`Comes with practise Honey, and I get a lot of that.` he said smiling.

There was a crash from upstairs.

`There goes the table, time I stepped in before the glass starts to fly`, he said. `Call me okay`,

He left the kitchen at a run and Angel smiled , now if only she could get Goniff back into this mayhem everything would be right with her world. She put down her mug , smiling as she heard him

chewing them off, and Casino's protestations about how unfair he was being, and headed for the jeep.

She had her own problem to sort out, and she had no idea where to start.


	4. Chapter 4

GONIFF 4

When Angel got back to the cottage she saw Goniff sitting in the garden staring into space. She made coffee and sandwiches and took them out to him.

`Thought that you might be hungry`, she said.

`Thanks`, he said and put the sandwiches on the table in front of him.

Angel looked at him sadly.

`Please let me help you luv, tell me what to do , tell me how to make this better for you, I'll do anything, all you have to do is tell me what you need`, she said quietly.

`I don't know Angel`, he said softly, `I just feel afraid.

`Of what?

`Everything, nothing, hell I don't know`, he said.

He put his head in his hands and shook his head.

`I just don't know`,

Angel knelt down in front of him and wrapped her arms around him.

`Just remember one thing above all else Goniff, you are not alone. Whatever this is we will fight it together, and we will win Goniff `, she said holding him tightly.

She knelt with his head on her shoulder , and his arms slowly encircled her

Eventually he released her.

`Why do you care what happens to me? He asked.

`I like you ? She said simply.

`Why?

She sat back on her haunches.

`Well for one thing you always make me smile, you see the bright side of everything, and with you around things never seem quite so bad, and I'm not the only one that feels that way either. Even on

his worst day you can manage to get a smile out of Craig.` she explained. `That's why I hate to see you like this it's just not you`.

`Guess I can't be the clown all of the time `, he said.

`Tell me about the nightmare`, she said softly.

`Can't`. he said.

`Why not? Don't you remember? She asked.

He shuddered.

`I remember all of it`. He said.

`Then tell me , please, it might help `,

`You'll think I'm stupid `he said.

Angel took hold of both his hands in hers.

`I would never think that, never`, she said.

Goniff stood up suddenly , almost knocking her backwards.

`I'm scared of being alone`, he almost shouted.

`I don't understand , you asked me to leave you here alone`, she said.

`Not here, he said quietly, `Over there.

`Oh `, she said.

`What if it had been me with Chief instead of Actor, What would have happened then, what if he left me like he did Actor , I would have been caught, probably shot, I would have walked straight into

that house and she would have shopped me to the Krauts. They'd never have found me, I know it.` he said` Probably wouldn't even have looked`.

`She walked up to him,

`You're afraid of getting lost ? She asked.

`Yeah, told you it was stupid, I'm stupid. he said.

`Don't you think Actor was afraid too? She asked him.

`Why should he be , he speaks the lingo, he could pass himself off as a Kraut, I wouldn't know what to do .` he said. I'm just a scaredy cat , a coward, amazed they even want me with them.

`I think you are amazing`, said Angel quietly.

`Huh, yeah right`.

`Goniff , you go over there whenever you're told, do whatever you're told, and you don't think twice about it most of the time, the fact that you don't speak German only makes you and Chief a little

braver than the rest of them in my eyes`, she said.

`You mean that, you don't think I'm a….

`Goniff if you say that word again I'm gonna slug you so help me`, said Angel angrily , and if I ever hear anyone call you that they're gonna be spitting their teeth out, and I don't care who they are`.

Angel saw the first real smile for a long time.

`What's so funny? She asked him.

`Just seeing the Warden spitting teeth`, he said

She laughed with him.

`He would never even think that Goniff, if he did you would have been back inside a long time ago`, she said.

`Yeah I know `,

`So what about the nightmare? She asked.

He looked at her and knew that he could tell her and, that she would understand.

`I'm in the woods, I've got lost, I can hear them shouting at me to keep up , but as hard as I try I can't get close to them, I just can't keep up, and then they're gone and there's nothing but silence,

they left me, I start to run, and then the shooting starts and I hide in a fallen tree stump, stay there for what seems like forever. To scared to help them. When I come out I find them. They're all dead,

just lying there starring at me, like it was all my fault, and then I hear the Krauts coming back and I start to run, I leave them, and I run , and just keep running, and that's when I wake up .I'm cold

and scared and I don't know what to do , who to trust, and I'm afraid`, he ended.

He was shaking, standing with his arms wrapped around his chest.

`You need to go inside `, she said, `You're shivering.

`Not the cold, this is usually how I wake up`, he said.

Neither one of them had seen Craig enter the garden.

`I wish you could have trusted me enough to talk to me Goniff`, he said

Goniff looked was if he was going to bolt..

`We all have the nightmares, even me, `. He said

Goniff starred at him in amazement.

`You Warden? But you're a soldier, nothing scares you, you got medals and everything.` said Goniff.

Craig laughed

You think that means I don't get scared sometimes? Because if you do then you're very wrong. I'm scared every time we go out, that's why I make you go over the plans so many times, you are my

responsibility, and if one of you gets hurt or caught , then it's my fault, it means I did something wrong. And that scares me Goniff. Ask Chief too, even he gets scared sometimes , and Actor, when he's

pulling a con, and Casino too although he'd probably, never admit to it, and the nightmares , well I have those every time a mission goes wrong. Wake up in a cold sweat sometimes too, just like

you `,He said calmly.

Goniff just stood and looked at him, wondering if he was telling the truth.

Goniff we all get scared, that 's partly what makes so damn good at what we do`, he said. `Makes us careful

`Didn't think you would understand Warden, that's why I never said anything`, he said.

`Well maybe from now on we all ought to make a point of talking about it`, said Craig

Angel starred at them both.

`Why don't I get some coffee going and you two come and sit by the fire and talk properly, might just do the both of you some good , she said.

Craig turned to go inside

`That would be good Angel, you coming Goniff.? He asked.

`Yeah Warden, right behind you`, he said

Just so you know Goniff, I trust all of you , and no matter what I wouldn't ever leave any one of you behind, anyway it would take too long to train someone else up , now wouldn't it? he asked smiling

at him

`Sure thing Warden`, said Goniff

laughing

`They sat down in the two armchairs closest to the fire and Angel brought the coffee.

`I think that you need to make sure that Goniff knows which way is home when you're over there`, said Angel.

`Got some ideas about that`, said Craig. Some special training out in the woods somewhere should do nicely, might just get Chief involved too, you couldn't get a better teacher`,

`Aw come on Warden, you know I'm useless at that , I'll just get lost. Then Chief will think I'm stupid, him being so good and all` .he said

`Won't ever do that man , should know me better than that by now.` said a voice from the doorway. `Was worried 'bout you after the Warden left, thought there was something wrong`, Chief said in

way of an explanation.

`This is turning into quite a party`, said Angel . Only two more to go and I'll have a full house.

`Well actually! Casino's , helping Actor out of the jeep.` said Chief

`What jeep would that be? Asked Craig.

`So what we miss? Asked Casino. `What sort of trouble you got yourself into this time limey?

`Not as much as you have Casino, Goniff has permission to be here which is more than can be said for the rest of you.` said Craig seriously.

`More coffee`. Said Angel as she disappeared into the kitchen.

`You can't expect us to just sit there while he's in trouble Warden, not when you take off like that, without a word, what are we supposed to think? Said Casino.

`Yeah what's the big deal anyway? Asked Chief.

`What we really want to know is can we do anything to help you Goniff? Asked Actor

Goniff suddenly burst out laughing

`Well that's certainly nice to hear , but do you actually have a reason for the hysteria? She asked

`I was worried I'd end up on my own, but look, I can't get rid of them`, he said.

`Well I did tell you that , now didn't I ? she asked

`Yeah you did`, he said still giggling.

Angel laughed with him.

`You wouldn't have any of that pie left , would you? he asked

`You know I might just be able to find some`, she said

Goniff walked to her

`Thanks for everything`, he said `Don't think the nightmare will come back now`.

`Hey you get them too? asked Casino, `Last one I had was a real doozy, ended up in front of a firing squad`,

Angel and Goniff looked at each other and started to giggle.

`What did I say? Asked Casino

`This just caused the giggles to turn into mild hysteria.

`Will some one please tell me what I said that was so damn funny? He asked.

`Maybe it's just the thought of you being in front of a firing squad pappy`, said Chief dryly.

`The laughter continued from the kitchen.

`You gonna be all right now? She asked

Goniff tried to calm down

`Yeah , I think I will `, he said, thought I was the only one, kinda got things wrong didn't I?

`Just a tad`, she said.` Better get this pie in there before they wreck the place , and Goniff , next time , just talk to someone , okay, I'm always here for you , anytime, drop in whenever you need to,

the rest of them do, sometimes I think I'm running a hotel for delinquents. `

Goniff laughed.

`I will , I promise, but you know what, I don't think I'm going to need too luv, except just to visit you `,

`That Goniff is just what I wanted to hear`, she said as she passed him the pie. Take that through and I'll get the plates will you ?

`Sure thing luv, just one question though`.

`What's that Goniff`, she asked smiling

`Well what's the rest of you goin' to eat?


End file.
